What if a Jupiter-mass gas giant orbited the Sun every 4 days at just 0.05 AU — scorching by any measure, and parked well inside Mercury's orbit? This scenario adds a classic hot Jupiter to the real Solar System as of 1 January 2025. Hot Jupiters are common around other stars but absent from ours, likely because Jupiter formed beyond the frost line and never migrated inward. At 0.05 AU the intruder's gravity would tug the terrestrial planets and perturb Mercury's already precarious orbit, while the real Jupiter, Saturn, and the ice giants respond to the new mass distribution over secular timescales.